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It's Not a Competition

6/22/2019

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Today it seems like everyone is doing something to improve themselves. Trying a new diet, joining a gym, even changing jobs. It's easy to see what someone else is doing on social media or TV and get caught up comparing yourself to them. Maybe you want to look like that model on the cover of a magazine, or be able to run a marathon like your friend just did. Maybe you just "wish you had the self-control" that others seem to have. 

As hard as it is, you have to stop worrying about what they are doing and focus on yourself. I'm guilty of it too that's for sure. I've found myself comparing my life to others all the time. Some of them were friends, family members, and others, people that I don't even know. It's hard not to. But regardless of the situation, one thing is certain... Their situation doesn't determine yours. At the end of the day it doesn't really matter what they are doing. Your life, your aspirations and your success depends on YOU. 
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The problem with comparing yourself to others
  1. You're not them. We all have individual differences that make us who we are. We know that, but yet still get upset when we do the same thing (workout, diet, etc.) and don't see the same results. Our genetics are different, our lifestyles are different, even our work ethic and amount of grit are different. You may not work as hard as other people, you may not have the same amount of time, or money or tons of other reasons why your situation is different than theirs. It wouldn't make sense to directly compare yourself to someone else. 
  2. Results take time. If you catch yourself comparing yourself to someone who is already where you want to be, you'll never be happy. It took them time and consistency to get to that point, and it's going to be the same for you. Slow and steady progress over time is the name of the game.  It is okay to have a role model as motivation, but remember to give yourself a break and give yourself time to work toward your goals. You shouldn't be able to get where they are anyways. If they keep working hard they will keep seeing improvements too - and they should. Besides, if they quit doing what got them to that point, why would you want to emulate them anyways? 
  3. Other people are working hard too. It's impossible for us to know all of the little things that go into someone else's success. How much do we really know about what someone else is doing to get where they are? Probably not that much. You can copy workouts that you see online, make recipes that other people post, but that doesn't mean you are going to look like they do. That's how social media and commercials get us. They put up models using a product (take one of those electric ab stimulators for example), and trick us to think we can look like them if we just buy that product. They play on our emotion and knee-jerk responses. Well let me tell you, none of those people on the commercials got to look the way that they did just by using the thing that is being advertised. Actually, they probably looked like that beforehand from all the hard work on their nutrition, sleep, fitness and lifestyle - that's what allowed them to get that gig in the first place. We just never get to see that part. 

So what's the solution? 
In order to be happy and satisfied, you must look inward rather than outward. 
  1. Start. Unless you make a decision to change your situation you're not going to see any progress anyways. So make the decision to start your journey. 
  2. Set your own goals. Remember to be realistic. Looking at your unique situation. What do you want to accomplish? Once you have that figured out, in what time frame do you want to accomplish it? Then create a plan. How are you going to get there? If you're not sure, maybe consider hiring a coach. Let someone else help you find the right path to reach the point where you want to be. Learn tips and tricks along the way to sustain that once you get there. 
  3. Reflect on the results. Keep track of where you came from and the results along the way. Whether that is through before/after photos, measurements, clothing size changes, athletic performance improvements, etc. (Notice I did not say scale weight... yes it is important, but it is not the most important thing). One of the most motivating things out there is being able to see results. Results are what lead to you continuing to push yourself day after day.  Reflection is also important the opposite way. It is important to periodically evaluate what you are doing to determine if it is yielding the results you were looking for. Unless you objectively assess your situation, you could just be blindly doing things that you think are beneficial without really knowing. 
  4. Be consistent. Results don't happen in a day, or a week... Well, they can - but that's not true progress. Working smart and hard over time is what leads to long term, sustainable results. Period. 

Thanks for reading. If this post resonates with you, please let me know. Leave a comment below, and share this with someone else. 
Andrew

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